This was a review I just read on Amazon.com for a Grateful Dead album:

The Greatful Dead were nothing but an infantile gang of cackling tramps. While they fecklessly hawked their cheap ties to K-Mart, they relentlessly puked hour upon hour of gelatinized nonsense onto their pony-tailed legions of unemployed, mind-altered drones. Now, I may not be the spokesperson for the American way, but I’m pretty sure that virulent body odor, marijuana cigarettes, and hay-seed mentalities do NOT make the world go around. Therefore, as we enter the 21st century, let’s all try to remember our common humanity, and let us categorically reject the naive and sophomoric blather that has been the ultimate legacy of the silly 1960’s. To chuck this unfortunate and ridiculous collection of nursery rhymes into the rubbish would be a good start. Thank you very much.

EOT

Also, I hope to get the new format up this weekend. The above will undoubtedly be my first post.

Dear Diary,

today roy told me to get rid of you but I’m not going to, cause everyone wants to read about me! i’m so important. back to business. hey everyone, i did stuff today. ruby is great

Love, Fufflebee

Guy: You said fill, right? Not twenty?

Me: Yeah, fill it up, please.

Guy: Ahh, okay. Just making sure, cause these prices are crazy.

Me: (Laughs) And you’re the one saying this.

Guy: What?

Me: ..I mean, you’re selling the gas, and even You think these prices are ridiculous.

Guy: Well, I don’t make the prices…

Me: Yeah, I know it, but still…it’s gotten That bad, where you’d detach yourself like that.

Guy: (Laughing) Oh, oh I see. You know what happens is, people come in, they say fill, and then they’re like, OH NO NO, I SAID FIVE DOLLARS! And I’ve got to pay for that.

Me: You’re serious?? Oh, that’s ridiculous.

Guy: You know who does that a lot? Women. Fucking assholes.

Me: (polite laugh) Oh, those stupid bitches.

Guy: (laughs hard) Okay, you have a good night.

Me: Yeah, you too meng.

Hi hot mommies and crazy banditos. I didn’t write cause I was too busy living. Since I last RAPPED AT YOU, I’ve been busy helping my life not turn into crap.

I got a new job, which takes me 40 minutes to get to, and 20 minutes to drive home from, due to its proximity to the George Washington Bridge. Add those up, and that’s still half my old commute time. The only part that sucks is I had the week off beforehand, and I forgot how to get enough sleep and pay attention during the day. I think when I finally remember I have to work for a living, and I can’t just sit at home watching Scarface all day, the new place will seem spectacular.

Looking for schools is on hold, until I find an apartment, and I figure out what my finances are going to be like. If I can’t afford it, then shitewands. More on that later, I guess.

Project Unfat is proceeding successfully. I’ve managed to pull just about every muscle in my body in the process, and thanks to the summer-like heat, I’ve also ended up with dehydration twice. I’d like to thank my sponsors Gatorade and Pathmark in Hackensack, for being open 24 hours so I can get wacky vitamins and strange elixirs at all hours. I can do 500 inverted pull-ups at a time; wow, those are hard. Also, I can now both bench, as well as eat and drink, three times my weight, instead of just the latter.

I’ll be honest, I’m beginning to tire of this whole blog thing. I thought I’d be more candid, and not talk about menial stuff like the above, but either I’ve gotten shy, or I’ve realized doing that in a place like this is kind of a silly. I started this site up for two reasons: encourage me to write, and learn to make a web page in Ruby on Rails. As far as the programming part, I haven’t touched Ruby or Rails really for months, and if I looked at this page source I’d probably not know what it means. Hmm.

And, as for writing, I don’t have the time, or I’ve been doing it elsewhere. My life has become 100% action, and this Fuffletonia place is a relic from back when it was 100% thought. Maybe in the future, I can find 50/50, and there’ll be less forced crap, like this one.

Sorry, kids. Next time I’ll do better.