THE SOUL selects her own society,
Then shuts the door;
On her divine majority
Obtrude no more.
Unmoved, she notes the chariot’s pausing
At her low gate;
Unmoved, an emperor is kneeling
Upon her mat.
I’ve known her from an ample nation
Choose one;
Then close the valves of her attention
Like stone.
– Emily Dickinson
I’m going to talk about nostalgia. I am a slave to nostalgia. Sometimes I’m caught believing that the best times of my life have already passed, and I am constantly attempting in vain to recreate these moments. Lately, I’ve begun to accept that better is possible, but I have to work and risk myself, in order to acquire it.
My closest friends, on separate occasions, have all shared with me a common desire: to have lived in times before the present. This time range includes the early 20th century, up to and including when Kennedy was elected president. While at first I thought it was an escape from modern despair, or because the time period has been romanticized greatly by history, I think that they are motivated by something else here.
Back then, beauty and elegance were a priority. Intellect, hard work, and reason were rewarded qualities. Today, everything is cold, forced, instant, unsavored. Liberals and conservatives combat to create a society where either nothing or everything is taboo, instead of a balance where extremism is not applied universally. There is a cruel counterbalance between the haves and have-nots. People suffer who should never have to. Some live their lives without ever really living.
I believe this to be the source of my longing of the past: what is important to me used to be common desire, and yet now it is lost, and almost forgotten. Others cannot understand my priorities, and in their own ways mock and ridicule them. My staunchness and unwavering has cost me many acquaintances, but those who remain, are precious to me, for we share a dying dream.
I’m going to make this first one a good one, and clear the air about what’s going to go on here.
* Yes, some of this is temporary (especially that Comic Sans MS header). It’s encouragement for me to not be a stranger to the guts of the page. I remembered how to migrate and deploy, but some stuff I shouldn’t have forgot but I did.
* The reason I grew lax in updating the last BLAGH was because I now truly hate the Internet. Exhibitionists, frauds, and people WASTING their lives away altering kilobytes of data. For the bunch of months I posted here, I started becoming a waste of space, too. Nothing constructive ever happens here. I’m going to try to do something about it.
* Towards that end I’m going to make my entries longer, but I promise you no more bullshit. No more, I held hands with Mary Jane last night at the Summer’s Eve concert and on the way home I did something RADICAL and guys you have to hear about it. No, this is going to be a mo’ betta burger. I’m a pantastic writer, and yet I’ve devolved into a Livejournal/Twitter/Xanga/Myspace/Facebook whore. I guess it came from not trying, path of least resistance, shut up.
* Towards that end, nothing mundane or forced. Scout’s honor. I think I jumped the shark approximately after talking about going back to school, and that opened the “Everybody would just LOVE to hear about my boring life” door, and it was one I couldn’t shut. That sucked.
(The only proviso to this is if I need to have a personal event be an anecdote to a greater subject, but it won’t ever been the entire purpose of creating a post)
* If you’re reading up to this point, or even seeing this page at all, you are probably an awesome person, but don’t count on it!
WHY HAS NOONE TOLD ME OF THIS
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rebuild_of_Evangelion
You should all probably be pleased to know that I’ve got time this weekend to finally fix this mess up, unless my eye doctor dilates my pupils and I have to spend half the day wearing cheap sunglasses and hiding in shadows. Then nothing’s getting done! Oh yes, I’m serious this time, cause after last week’s painting odyssey, sitting around in front of a computer all day listening to Priest while rewriting code and CSS sounds better than anything I could think of.
The new format will be less “I went for a walk today and oh my gosh I did something and it was funny” and more stupid storytelling based on real-life crazy people. The entertainment value can probably go up 1000% if I keep events as non-current as possible, because my life was a lot more awesome when my interests didn’t include my heart rate and science and how much the blog needs to die and how I don’t have time for anything any more.
Oh yeah, I’ve been told I can’t post without a funny video, so here you go:
Sometimes I wonder…
How long is a MmmBOP?
Look, guys, today’s actually looking pretty good. I’ve just got to motivate myself with some victories in the real-world first. No race, no chores, just hang some blinds, eat some pancakes, and maybe I’ll get to some coding today!
mystery guest: i was born like 60 years too late
fuffle b: Yeah, we both was.
fuffle b: but then, social barriers would never allow us to meet!
fuffle b: Im too busy being Johnny Football to give the ORIENTAL GIRL the time of day
mystery guest: hahahaha
fuffle b: Every time you entered a room they’d have to play that Fu Manchu chord